Caffeine: A love/hate relationship

I have a love/hate relationship with caffeine. I love a lot of things that are caffeinated, but I hate being addicted to the point that if I don't drink caffeine, I get the dreaded headache.

I used to be able to take it or leave it. I never got into the morning coffee habit, so for the most part I could have a coffee or tea or soda some of the time, and not worry about having some daily. I wasn't really addicted.

I'd love to blame having children for my current caffeine dependence, and in some ways that is true. I can't count how many mornings I've stumbled into the kitchen after a long night with a fussy baby, the only thought on my mind being, "I'm not going to survive this day without something caffeinated!" A cup of tea, a mocha from a coffee shop, a diet coke... What was once a non-regular occurance somehow became an every day thing.

The worst is the diet coke. There can't be anything about soda of any kind that is good for you, diet or not. I got in the habit of drinking diet back in high school, partly because of some notion that I needed to watch my weight (which at the time, I did not) and partly because my younger brother is diabetic, so it's usually what we had in the house. My husband has been a terrrible diet coke addict for years and eventually it rubbed off on me. I found myself reaching for a diet coke at least once, often two or three times, a day.

The hubster is taking a break from diet coke right now, so we don't have any in the house. I've been drinking tea, which I actually love, but I still had two or three days of wicked headaches. And frankly, that pisses me off. I don't like that I *have* to consume certain things to avoid putting my body through withdrawl.

But am I ready to give up caffeinated beverages entirely? Can I say no to a giant glass of icy cold diet coke the next time we're out to dinner? Do I want to give up my mochas, or switch to decaf (which still has some caffeine anyway)? Not really....

So I'm stuck with either maintaining my habit enough to not go through withdrawl so I can enjoy a diet coke or a coffee once in a while, or giving up anything caffeinated entirely. What's a busy mom to do?

Pass me my tea.